You say goodbye, and I say hello....

I can't believe it's 2011. Wow. 2010 was, how shall I put it..... shittastic. 2 IVFs, 1 FET, 1 IUI. All BFNs. I'll leave it at that.

I'm feeling like 2011, may be our year.... or at least I was until I screwed up my medicine....twice yesterday!

Yesterday was the start of my stims. It was also the day where I was supposed to decrease my Lupron from 10 units every morning to 5. So the alarm goes off at 7:15 yesterday, Chris gets up, grabs the Lupron from the fridge comes upstairs, fills the vial, I alcohol swab my stomach, he injects the medicine, pulls the needle out and a lightbulb goes off "We were supposed to decrease to 5 units this morning!!!!!!" Oh SHIT! So I call the on-call number and the lovely Dr. J is on call. I tell her what I've done and she says "It should be okay. You may respond a little slower to start because you may be a little oversuppressed, but it should be okay." Fine, I really do think it will be okay, but I'm pissed at myself for making such a stupid careless mistake.

Cut to around 4:00 yesterday. I start to wonder if they want me to take my stims at a particular time of the day, so I pull out my nifty instruction sheet and see that Follistim (stim#1) is to be taken between 6:00-8:00 PM and Menopur (stim#2) is supposed to be taken WITH MY LUPRON, IN THE MORNING!!!! FUCK!!!!

So, I immediately call Lindsey and ask to be shot in the head, Lindsey laughs and says, call Dr. J again..... (I think Dr. J hates me).

I call Dr. J again.... for the second time.... on her Sunday afternoon. She answers as nice as she did the first time and I tell her about my second mishap of the day. Seriously, you'd think I've never done an IVF before. For God's sake, get your shit together, Amie! I asked Dr. J if I should just wait until today to start everything (reduce Lupron, start Menopur in the am, etc.). She looked at the calendar and decided that I may be too oversuppressed if I wait to start stims another day and to just take the Menopur ASAP and then do the Follistim as scheduled at 7:00 PM. She told me to go ahead and get on the correct schedule this morning. (and we did)

I am beyond pissed at myself. It's so stupid. Now, if this cycle fails, I will forever blame myself for screwing up my medicines. It's ridiculous. I'm trying to cling to the fact that it's super early and if I'm going to screw up, now's the time to do it. I'm also holding onto the fact that I was on Lupron for 17 days pre-stims with my past two IVFs instead of just 10 days, and perhaps that has something to do with the failures? Chris doesn't think that's the case, but I need something to cling to!

So now I'm up to three shots a day and 12 pills a day and will go in on Wednesday to see how things are cooking...

AM: Lupron (5 units)
Menopur (75)

PM: Follistim (225)
Prednisone
Prenatals
Folic acid
Baby aspirin
Pentasa (for Crohn's)